“I appeal to you, therefore, brothers, by the mercies of God, to present your bodies as a living sacrifice, holy and acceptable to God, which is your spiritual worship. Do not be conformed to this world, but be transformed by the renewing of your mind, that by testing you may discern what is the will of God, what is good and acceptable and perfect.” -Romans 12:1-2

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Muscle growth, scientifically known as hypertrophy, is a biological process that occurs when muscle fibers adapt to repeated stress from resistance training. This process involves mechanical tension, metabolic stress, and microscopic muscle damage, all of which stimulate cellular repair and growth.

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Just as an athlete lifts weights in order to see muscle growth, so we too must also learn to expect and lean into resistance in order to see growth in our lives. Creating a family legacy that honors God and committing to live in a way that follows in Christ’s example is not going to be easy. Parents have the very weighty responsibility to shepherd well the souls entrusted to their care. This requires daily faithfulness to living a life of purpose. It requires choosing the harder paths.

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And yet… How easy it is to default to and crave a life of ease, to take the path of least resistance. Easier often feels better in the moment and requires less effort, time, and sacrifice on our parts. Certainly it’s easier to hand your toddler an ipad in the restaurant than to take the time to consistently teach self-control and table manners. It’s easier to give into your teenager’s demands than to set and hold to boundaries. It’s easier to check out and binge a show after bedtime than to connect intentionally with your spouse and prepare your home for a peaceful morning. The problem with easy is that it usually has future consequences.

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You may be familiar with the phrase “pay me now or pay me later”. Often associated with the FRAM oil filter commercials from the 1970’s and 1980’s, it implies that paying for services or products now can prevent larger, more expensive costs in the future. For example, if you neglect to replace an oil filter in your vehicle, you may face costly engine repairs later. Essentially, making a small sacrifice in the moment can save you from disaster in the future. In her book, “Hard Is Not the Same Thing as Bad”, Abby Halberstadt states, “... so often, our obsession with ease is the very thing that keeps us stuck in cycles of self-indulgence and self-sabotage.”

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Look to the example of Jesus

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It is obvious that Jesus himself denied the “quick and easy” path when he “for the joy set before him” endured the painful and humiliating death on a cross. Yet we see that he didn’t have a life of ease leading up to this sacrificial death either. In Isaiah 53, he is referred to as a “man of sorrows”, acquainted with grief and despised and rejected by men. Hebrews 5:8 tells us that he “learned obedience through what he suffered”. If the Son of God learned instruction through taking the hard path, how much more will faithfulness in the mundane, ordinary, and sometimes downright difficult circumstances of life benefit and teach us?

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In Luke 9, Jesus laid out for his followers the hard path they were to take in this life. “Whoever wants to be my disciple must deny themselves and take up their cross and follow me. For whoever wants to save their life will lose it, but whoever loses their life for me will find it. What good will it be for someone to gain the whole world, yet forfeit their soul? Or what can anyone give in exchange for their soul?” Jesus also warns his disciples of the trials that would come to them as a result of following him. The Christian walk has no promise of ease, but there is a promise that if we persevere through hardship, we will be mature and complete, lacking nothing (James 1:2-4).

Choosing the harder ways will feel counter cultural. The mere idea of parenting “the hard way” is often met with ridicule. We see mothers glorifying on social media their “earned” glass of wine after a day of parenting or fathers spending the day on the golf course instead of putting in the hard work of sacrifice and service in marriage and fatherhood. In the sermon on the mount, Jesus proclaims that “...the gate is wide and the way is easy that leads to destruction, and those who enter by it are many. [But] the gate is narrow and the way is hard that leads to life, and those who find it are few.” Friends, choose the narrow path. Though it will be hard, we will reap a harvest of righteousness if we do not give up. We will see growth in ourselves and fruit in our children if we do not compromise in the little things, if we remain faithful,  “press[ing] on toward the goal to win the prize for which God has called [us] heavenward in Christ Jesus.”