There is a subtle yet significant mindset in recent years that often slips into conversations about aging: “I’ve done my time.” This cultural narrative says: you raised your kids, now you’ve earned a well-deserved retreat from involvement to enjoy life on your own terms. And in many ways, rest is a gift from God. But when that mindset becomes a reason to disengage from the lives of adult children and grandchildren, something precious can be lost.

Scripture reveals a very different picture of generational faithfulness- one that deepens with retirement, rather than disengages. 

Psalm 145:4 says, “One generation shall commend your works to another, and shall declare your mighty acts.” That’s not a call limited by age or season. It’s a lifelong invitation.

Grandparenting, from a biblical perspective, is not a passive role. It’s not merely about occasional visits, holiday gifts, or watching from a distance. It’s an opportunity—perhaps one of the most powerful ones—to intentionally invest in the spiritual and emotional lives of the next generation.

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Lisa Applebee

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As Lisa shared more of her family’s journey it was evident that showing up and pursuing a relationship with each other is at the core of this family that truly lives with a multi generational mindset. Lisa and Bill have the gift most grandparents don’t get to enjoy these days, of living in the same area as all 4 of their kids, their spouses, and 18 grandkids. As they intentionally invest in their kids and grandkids these are the main lessons I heard from her life and story. 

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• Pursue your kids and grandkids.

                Meet them where they’re at with a willingness to adjust expectations to what they want or need in that season.

• Prioritize investing time and energy in your kids and grandkids over social events or career goals.

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• Use your resources to bless your children in whatever ways feel appropriate in the season, even in radical ways such as helping your kids afford to live close to you so you can continue to be involved in their daily lives.

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Julie Combset

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My husband, Rod, and I are so thankful that we have the time, energy, and resources to pour into our grandchildren! Proverbs 17:6 "Children's children are a crown to the aged....".  Our crowns are beautiful and full and are a blessing from God! I know I'm a better  "Zsa Zsa" (my grandma name given to me by our first grandchild 15+ years ago) than I ever remember being a mom.  I am more patient, loving, intentional and relational now than I was 40 years ago! We have found that pouring into our family is a blessing and a privilege!  We have been able to be intentional with how we invest in their lives, making it a priority to be present with them both physically (when we are able) and emotionally.  Our adult children truly appreciate the times that we are available to be a part of their children's lives.  I tell the parents to ask and if we can help - we are happy to make their lives a bit easier and we will say "not this time" if we are busy!  

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I have sweet memories of time spent with my grandparents who lived in the same county where I grew up, and it has been important to us that we are creating memories with our grandchildren that they will one day remember just as I do. We have some grandchildren who live close to us and some who are a plane ride away.  My husband and I travel often to be in person with those that are farther away and we Facetime often. It's such a joy to stay in touch with our faraway little people!  

If I could give any advice to a fellow grandparent today, I would say that as much as you are able to, attend any activities that your grandchildren are involved in and offer support as often as possible!  Time goes by so quickly and when you can, pour into their lives.  I think our adult children make a big effort to talk about us to their children because they know that we care and are invested in them.  We have intentionally pursued relationship with them and our family is very close as a result.  I have told our children to stay connected to each other. We always say- make sure your siblings know they can count on you and as long as you tell one of them what's going on in your life - then we (the parents) don't need to know everything! Many of our grandchildren know the names and faces of their cousins, even though they live far apart.  

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Most importantly, praying for their little lives has had a huge impact. 

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If you are the parent of adult children or a grandparent finding yourself drifting toward disengagement, consider this: your role is not finished. It has changed in many ways, but it may be even more impactful now than ever before. You have the gift of a different perspective, the wisdom of experience, and (for most people) more time than you once did. These are not accidents; they are tools God can use to shape eternity.

Pray and ask the Lord, “How can I love my children and grandchildren well in this season?”

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